


Catch As Catch Can

by carolinecrane



Series: down is where we came from [26]
Category: Glee
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-10-24
Updated: 2010-10-24
Packaged: 2017-10-12 20:51:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,800
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/128944
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/carolinecrane/pseuds/carolinecrane
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They all just figured he was waiting.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Catch As Catch Can

Will's the first one to break the silence. While Puck and Kurt are in the room nobody says a word; they just watch the fight start in slow motion, focus swinging back and forth between Puck's confused expression and Kurt's furious one. But as soon as Kurt drags Puck out of the room Will's talking, _I'm sorry_ and _I had no idea_ and _they seemed so happy_ until Finn grabs his wrist, just to get him to stop.

Will's skin is warm under his fingers and Finn feels his pulse against his fingertips, right at the inside of his wrist where the skin is thinnest. For a second Will just looks down at Finn's hand, then he looks up at Finn and smiles.

"Sorry," he says, and Finn knows he's imagining it when it seems like Will gets a little closer.

"It's okay," Finn says. "It's not your fault."

"It's Puck's fault," Quinn adds, and Finn yanks his fingers away from Will's wrist.

He didn't hear Quinn come back into the room. Burt and Carole are still standing in the kitchen door, but they're not looking at him and Will. They're still staring toward the front hall, twin frowns making their foreheads wrinkle. Quinn's not exactly looking at him and Will either, but she left the kitchen doorway at some point, so he's pretty sure she saw the way he touched Will.

Not that it _means_ anything. He was just trying to get Will to shut up before he apologized himself into a stroke over something that isn't even his fault.

Quinn slides back into the seat on Finn's other side, still not looking at him as she lets out a sigh that makes her sound like she's bored, but Finn's known her long enough to tell when she's nervous. "Guess we're stuck here for awhile."

His mom makes a move like she's actually going to go out there, maybe try to talk some sense into Kurt or Puck or both of them. Finn's not sure whose side she'd come down on in this one. On the one hand, she's never been Puck's biggest fan, exactly, especially after that whole thing with the baby. But she's pretty much over that at this point, and Finn knows as well as anybody how much she loves a good wedding.

God knows she tortured him with her own for long enough.

Before she can go out there Burt reaches out and puts a hand on her arm, and Finn just barely catches the way his head shakes. "Honey, why don't we all sit down for dessert? Shame to let that beautiful cake of yours go to waste."

Carole presses her lips together for a second like she's going to argue, then she nods and turns back toward the kitchen. And Finn has to hand it to Burt; he's the only person Finn's ever seen derail Carole when she's in full-on Mom Mode.

Burt carries the coffee pot into the dining room himself, pouring cups all around and dumping more sugar in his than Kurt would allow if he was here to see it. Then he lets Carole cut him a huge slice of cake, and when she slides it in front of him he looks at them all, one by one.

"Nobody tells Kurt about this, got it?"

It's enough to break the tension a little, anyway, and Finn laughs along with the rest of them and digs into what is truly a spectacular cake. He's halfway through his first piece when they hear the front door slam, and every one of them freezes and looks toward the front of the house.

Burt's the first one to move, sighing and setting his napkin down. He leans over and kisses Finn's mom on the cheek, fingers pressing into her shoulder for a second before he turns and walks out of the room. Finn's always thought it was kind of cool, the way they could talk without using actual words. When he was younger he found it pretty frustrating, especially when they had whole conversations about him while he was sitting right there, but now that he's older he figures it just means they were meant to be together.

He's seen Puck and Kurt do the same thing a bunch of times this week, which makes the whole mess going on in the front hall even weirder. Everyone's quiet while they wait for Burt to come back, and when he does Finn can tell it's not good news.

"He'll be fine," Burt says to Carole, then he sits back down and smiles a little too brightly at the rest of them. "Anyone want more coffee?"

~

Will leaves not long after that. He doesn't make up an excuse about it getting late or needing to be somewhere in the morning or whatever. He just thanks Burt and Carole for having him, then he pats Quinn on the shoulder and tells her it's been good to see her. She reaches up and catches his hand, squeezing for a second and when she smiles Finn can tell she means it.

He's not sure why that makes him feel better, but it does.

Finn follows him out into the hall and waits while Will pulls his coat on. He's standing there with his hands in his pockets, wearing the shirt Kurt pretty much forced him into, and he has no idea what to say. So he just watches while Will pulls a scarf around his neck and reaches in his pocket for his keys, fidgeting with them for a couple seconds longer than he really needs to before he looks up at Finn again.

"I really am sorry."

"I know," Finn says. "Me too."

Will grins at him then, and for a second Finn forgets that he's not allowed to kiss him. He takes a step forward, then he catches himself and runs a nervous hand through his hair.

"They'll be fine," he says a second before Will says, "Do you have any plans tomorrow?"

"What?" Finn asks, and when Will blushes he knows he heard right. "I mean, no, nothing important. Why?"

"I thought maybe you'd like to come over and work on the car for awhile. Kurt had some good suggestions; I thought we could take a look at the timing belt."

"Yeah, sure," Finn answers. It should probably worry him that he doesn't even know where to _find_ the timing belt, but he figures there's a diagram or something in Burt's book.

"Great." Will smiles at him for a few more seconds, and it's not fair, because how's Finn supposed to remember to keep his hands to himself when Will's always looking at him like that? But before he loses it and does something stupid, Will clears his throat and reaches for the doorknob. "So I'll see you tomorrow."

"Yeah. I'll give you a call in the morning or whatever."

"Okay," Will says, flashing another smile and Finn's knees go a little weak as he pulls the door open and disappears. His whole body's flushed just from watching Will _smile_ , and it's pathetic, but Finn grins anyway and turns back toward the dining room.

When he gets there his mom and Burt are gone, and Quinn's at the table alone. She's got her phone out and she's texting someone, but when Finn sits down next to her she shuts her phone and looks up.

"Hey."

"Hey yourself," Quinn says, giving him that sad smile he's starting to get used to. "Did Schue have a good time?"

Finn shrugs and blushes and he knows she can tell, but it's not like he can do anything about it. "Right up until the big break-up scene, I guess."

"They're not breaking up," Quinn says, but he's not sure if she sounds so positive because she knows something the rest of them don't, or because she just wants to believe it. "They're both just stubborn idiots."

And that's true, so Finn doesn't argue. Instead he leans back in his chair and worries the edge of his napkin between two fingers, glancing at the door to the kitchen every so often in case his mom reappears.

"Look, Quinn, I'm sorry about...I'm just sorry, I guess."

Her mouth quirks into a real smile for once, and he knows she's thinking about telling him that yeah, he is pretty sorry. "You don't have to be sorry for me. I'm fine."

He forgets sometimes how awesome Quinn is. Forgets why he used to be so crazy about her back in high school, why he put up with the whole chastity routine for so long. Sure, when he found out she'd slept with Puck behind his back he spent a lot of time feeling like a chump, but once the hurt from that dulled a little and he moved on with Rachel, he could appreciate her again.

Quinn was a bitch back then, sure, but she could be sweet, and she was always smart. She wasn't exactly loyal or anything, but she saw things the way they were and she wasn't afraid to say so out loud. It's probably why he likes hanging out with her now, because she's the only one who's willing to tell him when he's being kind of a dick or a baby about stuff.

Which means he's been sort of using her as his own personal shrink, he guesses. For a second he considers apologizing for that too, but then he figures maybe she gets something out of it too. He's probably the biggest headcase she knows, after all, and practicing on him is probably helping her grades.

Finn laughs at the thought and shakes his head, leaning back in his chair to really look at her.

"I used to think we might get back together someday."

"You don't want to get back together with me, Finn," she says, still smiling but now she's kind of laughing at him too. "Besides, you're already seeing someone else."

"That obvious, huh?" he says, because it's not like there's any point in denying it. Technically he's not really _seeing_ Will, but he might as well be. He has a feeling if he ever does get around to telling Will how he feels, nothing much would change anyway.

Quinn shrugs, which is a yes, and Finn feels his face flush again. And it's so weird to talk about this stuff out loud, because he's almost twenty-three, for fuck's sake, and it seems like he should have figured it out a long time ago. Even Puck knew he wasn't totally straight way back in high school, so Finn doesn't get why it took him so long.

Except he worked really hard not to think about it, and he had Quinn and her chastity crusade, then Rachel and her giant ego, and they were both high-maintenance enough to keep him from having to deal with any other random thoughts he might have.

"We're not, you know. I mean, he's not. I think he still thinks of me as one of his students."

She shakes her head at him and gives him a look that says 'You're an idiot' without ever saying the words out loud, and he'd be impressed that she can still do that if he wasn't so busy worrying that if Quinn can tell how he feels about Will, maybe Will can too.

"You know, back in high school people talked. Even in Glee. We knew nothing was going on, but we all knew you were Schue's favorite," she says. She's smiling at him again, sad and sort of far away and he wonders how long she's been wanting to tell him this. "At first I thought it was some father figure replacement thing, but then your mom married Kurt's dad, and you and Schue still had this...thing."

"What thing?" he asks, because sure, he really liked Will even back then, liked how easy it was to be around him even though he was a teacher. Will was the first person he told when he found out Quinn was pregnant, and he still remembers the way Will's arms felt around him when he let Finn cry on his shoulder. But it was never more than that, never more than Will being a good teacher and a good friend.

"You were so naive, Finn. I mean, I would know, right? I took advantage of it often enough." Quinn smiles again, but he can tell what she means is 'I'm sorry'. "And Will...his wife was awful, then he couldn't keep Ms. Pillsbury, and how can you be as cute as Schue and not hang onto someone like Ms. Pillsbury? So we all just figured he was waiting."

"For what?"

"For you."

Finn feels heat spread up his neck and across his face, the blush spreading all the way to the roots of his hair. And he hates how much he wants that to be true, because he knows it's not. He's been alone with Will like a million times in the past few months, and if Will was ever going to stop thinking of Finn as one of his students, it would have happened by now.

"Yeah, well, you were wrong," he says, and he hears how miserable he sounds, but he can't make himself care. "He doesn't want me."

"How do you know?"

"What?"

Quinn's sigh tells him that she's not as patient as she pretends to be, but that's nothing new. He's been annoying her for years now, but she keeps talking to him, so she can't mind that much.

"Think of how much weirder it must be for Schue," she says, and Finn looks up from his hands long enough to take in her raised eyebrow and the way her mouth's lifted on one side, like she's trying not to laugh at him.

"I know you're having trouble with your gay identity crisis and the fact that you've been in love with our Spanish teacher for six years, but _he's_ the one who was your teacher. He's the one who's older, so he has to feel responsible for letting this happen. Every time he looks at you he probably thinks about how Burt and Carole are going to react when they find out. If there's ever anything _to_ find out."

The way she says it tells him she's not all that sure there will be, and it's not like he can argue with her, not when he's too scared to do anything about it. Finn blushes all over again and glances toward the kitchen door, but there's still no sign of his mom or Burt.

Up to now he's been working so hard to convince himself that it's not going to happen that he hasn't stopped to worry about what happens when he has to tell his mom. He thinks Burt might already have a clue; there was the Camaro repair manual, for one thing, and he'd laugh at how alike Burt and Kurt are with their instruction manuals and all if he wasn't busy having a nervous breakdown at the thought of telling Will how he feels. And then telling his mom.

"Look, just promise me something," Quinn says, and instead of asking what, Finn just says, "Okay."

"Promise you'll at least give him the chance to turn you down. Take a chance for once in your life, Finn."

She leans in and kisses his cheek, then she stands up and heads for the door. It takes Finn a second to realize she's leaving, but when he does he pushes his chair back and follows her into the hall. She's already pulling her coat on when he catches up to her, and Finn crosses the space between them and reaches out to help her.

"Thanks."

"I think that's my line," Finn says, grinning when she laughs at him. "Seriously, Quinn. Thanks."

"Don't get used to it. Someday I'll be able to bill you."

He laughs and pulls the door open for her, shivering in the doorway until he sees her start her car and pull away from the curb. Then he shuts the door and leans against it, staring at the door to the basement and wondering if it's safe to go downstairs.

~

Kurt's actually handling the whole engagement mess pretty well, Finn decides. Either that or he's a better actor than Finn ever gave him credit for, because he seems pretty calm about the whole thing. When Finn finds him he's looking through their old yearbooks, and at first Finn's a little worried that Kurt's looking at Puck's picture and getting all weepy, but it turns out he's looking at the Glee pictures from their senior year.

It's been awhile since Finn thought about any of that, even longer since he looked at the pictures. When he sees the one of him and Rachel he remembers the song they were singing, remembers how much Will liked it and how he went on and on about how perfect it was for Finn's voice. That didn't help make it a decent song, but Finn sang it anyway, and he can't help smiling when he remembers the way Will beamed at him when he heard Finn sing it the first time.

Back then Finn always figured Will smiled at him like that because he saw Finn as their ticket to Nationals. Back then it just seemed like Will being a good teacher, but if Quinn's right, he was the only one.

 _We all just figured he was waiting._

He wants to ask Kurt if he saw it back then, if it really was everybody but him like Quinn says, but before he gets the question out Kurt's phone starts playing a really cheesy song. He's pretty sure Kurt's not a closet Hootie and the Blowfish fan, which means there's a story there, but when Kurt picks up the phone and then practically leaps off the bed, Finn knows he's not going to hear it.

A minute later Puck's standing in the middle of their room, and even before he asks Finn knows what he's going to say. And it's not like he's going to say no, considering this whole mess is kind of his fault. So he stammers an answer they probably don't even hear and grabs some stuff from his side of the room, pocketing his phone at the last minute before he heads for the living room and an uncomfortable night on the couch.

It's almost midnight when he reaches the living room and tosses his pillow on one end of the couch. Finn reaches into his pocket and pulls out his phone, telling himself he shouldn't call. It's late and Will's probably asleep or at least trying, and they're not the kind of friends who call each other in the middle of the night.

But he's too tall to stretch out comfortably and he's too keyed up to even try to sleep, so Finn dials Will's number anyway and does his best to settle into the cushions. He expects to get Will's voicemail, and he's not sure what he's going to say, because it's not like Will asked him to call with an update about his brother's love life. Still, he did feel a little responsible, and Finn knows what that's like, so he figures it's as good an excuse as any.

After the third ring he braces himself for Will's voicemail, but before he gets to the fourth ring the line connects.

"Hello?"

Will sounds sort of out of it, like maybe he really was asleep. Which means he's probably in bed, and Finn closes his eyes and doesn't even try not to picture it.

"Hey. Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you."

"You didn't," Will lies, and Finn can hear him moving around in bed, maybe pushing the sheet back and sitting up and he has to swallow hard against the sudden dryness in his throat. "Though I have to say, when you said you'd call I wasn't really expecting to hear from you so soon."

He sounds more awake now, and Finn's glad they're not in the same room so Will can't see him blushing.

"Puck's here," he says, then he blushes even harder. "I mean he came back. They kicked me out of the room, but it seems like they're going to work it out. I just thought you'd want to know."

"Good. I mean, thanks for letting me know. I'm glad they're talking things out."

Finn's not all that convinced that they're down there talking, but he doesn't say so, because the last thing he needs to do is picture his brother and Puck having make-up sex while he's on the phone with Will.

"Yeah, no problem," Finn says. "Listen, I'm really sorry about waking you up."

"It's fine," Will answers, and the way his voice goes sort of soft sends a shiver down Finn's spine. "So about tomorrow, do you want to come by around 2:00? I figured we could have some dinner after, maybe watch a movie?"

 _Like a date_ , Finn thinks, and his heart's hammering so hard in his chest that he's sure Will can hear it over the phone. "Yeah, okay," he says, wincing at the way his voice cracks. He swallows hard and squeezes his eyes shut, then he opens them again to stare at the ceiling. "I'll check at the shop and see if we've got the right belt in stock."

"You don't have to. I could swing by there in the morning."

"It's no trouble," Finn says, hand on his chest and Jesus, he can _feel_ his heart racing. "I mean, I should go in for a couple hours anyway, so I'll be there already."

"Thanks."

He wishes he could think of a reason to keep talking, just to keep Will on the phone for a little while longer. But they're going to see each other tomorrow -- they have a _date_ tomorrow -- and it's stupid to drag out the conversation when Will probably wants to go back to sleep.

"So I'll see you tomorrow."

"See you then," Will says, his smile bleeding into his voice and Finn has to swallow a groan. "Goodnight, Finn."

Finn hangs up before he has a chance to say anything stupid, then he sets his phone down on the coffee table and runs a hand over his face. And he knows he's not getting much sleep tonight, but he stands up long enough to pull his clothes off anyway. Once he's down to his boxers and a pair of socks he settles down on the couch and pulls his blanket over him, then he closes his eyes and tries not to picture Will in his big, empty bed across town.


End file.
